Can gay couples go to heaven

Betty Harper is so "sick and tired" of trying to find a church where she feels truly welcomed as a gay woman that she is planning to start her own. The year-old charity worker from Llanddulas, Conwy county, is engaged to her partner of two years. Both are Christians who want to find somewhere accepting to practise their faith but have so far not found what they are looking for locally.

Betty has travelled a long road to accepting her sexuality. Raised in a "very, very strict" Christian household, the message she heard growing up was that same-sex relationships were sinful. She explains: "When I was younger I felt different to my friends. I wasn't attracted to the boys [but] I was attracted to the girls.

Betty remembers first mentioning her ideas about her sexuality when she was in Year 8 and entering her teenage years. You can't change how you feel. She even tried to use her faith to alter who she really was because of her conditioning. Betty's life is intimately bound up with her religion.

She works as centre manager for a Christian charity offering community support and aid to the people of Rhyl, Denbighshire, taking over from her mother who helped can gay couples go to heaven the charity out of a church during the Covid pandemic. Her personal faith and relationship with Christianity is strong - it is clear to see it permeates every aspect of her life, and this remains the case despite some of the experiences she has had with churchgoers who disapprove of homosexuality, and have made that plain to her.

However, when she initially embarked on a relationship with a woman, she went through a crisis of belief. She and her current partner are now "unravelling" elements of past conditioning after "all those years of being drilled, 'you're going to hell, you're going to hell'". It has led to a breach with her father's side of the family.

They've kind of disowned me because I'm with a woman," she says. She has been told by one family member they pray they can go to hell in her place so she can go to heaven. That's really hard for me to hear and it made me doubt myself, and it's that conditioning that needs to be unravelled," she says.

Perhaps ironically, it was through a church that she and her partner Hannah first met, after Betty and her mother visited an old place of worship that her future partner attended. Although Hannah had not come out at the time she became a Christian, she still experienced anti-gay sentiments through Sunday services.

She was like, 'hang on that's ridiculous, why can't you be accepted for being gay? But if you're married it's a bit of a taboo subject," she says. At one church, initially welcoming to the couple, Betty says she was told after consultations with members of the congregation that she could attend choir rehearsals.

But she was also told not sing or perform on stage because "we wouldn't want you to influence the younger people, and you couldn't be a role model for them". After conditions were also put on her partner working with the Sunday school, Betty says she "walked away". So I'm going to start something'," she added.

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She says the "spur of the moment" decision is something she has run with "because it is so needed". She is now trying to find a wider group of people who are interested, locate a building and a "wholly accepting" pastor for the church, and has already had positive responses to the idea online.

Straight people are welcome. Everybody is welcome, even if you're not a Christian," she said.